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Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself, by Melody Beattie
Ebook Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself, by Melody Beattie
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Is someone else's problem your problem? If, like so many others, you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to someone else's, you may be codependent--and you may find yourself in this book--Codependent No More.
The healing touchstone of millions, this modern classic by one of America's best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life.
With instructive life stories, personal reflections, exercises, and self-tests, Codependent No More is a simple, straightforward, readable map of the perplexing world of codependency--charting the path to freedom and a lifetime of healing, hope, and happiness.
Melody Beattie is the author of Beyond Codependency, The Language of Letting Go, Stop Being Mean to Yourself, The Codependent No More Workbook and Playing It by Heart.
- Sales Rank: #531 in Books
- Brand: Hazelden
- Published on: 1987
- Released on: 1986-09-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x 5.25" w x .50" l, 1.00 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 229 pages
- Great product!
Review
In Newsweek magazine, Dr. Drew Pinsky named Melody Beattie's Codependent No More one of the four essential self-help books available today, calling it the "grandaddy of addiction tomes."
"Melody Beattie is an American phenomenon....She understands being overboard, which helps her throw best-selling lifelines to those still adrift."
--TIME
About the Author
Beattie was a struggling single parent of two children and freelance author and journalist cranking out stories for a small-town daily newspaper in 1986 when she came up with a book idea. She wanted to write a book about what happens to people when they love someone who is addicted to alcohol and other drugs."There were many books out there about how to help an addict or alcoholic. Nobody was talking about how an addict impacts the lives of the people around him or her, and how crazy you can become when you love someone who is addicted," Beattie said. "Even though I was sober, I didn't know how crazy I could get until it happened to me." Twenty publishers turned down Beattie's book proposal. "It's a good idea, but we don't think there's that many codependents out there," they wrote back.Hazelden, however, a treatment center and recovery publisher based in Minnesota, saw a need for the book. The publisher understood how families of alcoholics suffer and believed Beattie's book idea would help people. Beattie marched to the welfare department, asked for enough financial help to make it through the three months it would take her to write the book, then locked herself in a basement office and cranked out Codependent No More. Codependent No More has now sold 3.5 million copies. Beattie has since written nine more books, five for major publishing houses on the east and west coasts. She relocated from Minnesota to California, and she has long-since paid back the welfare department. Beattie has appeared in the pages of Newsweek and People and has been a regular guest on Geraldo and Oprah. Playing It By Heart is Beattie's first original book for Hazelden since 1990; the book is a return to her recovery roots that first brought her national recognition.
From AudioFile
For twenty years Melody Beattie has been writing lucidly about codependency--the pattern of trying to control or change someone who repeatedly makes trouble for themselves and others, and who usually is manipulating and controlling others as well. The problem is often part of an addictive or depressive syndrome or both (which the author understands well from her own experience); the solution she offers is to work extra hard at clarifying each person's boundaries, keeping everyone's responsibilities separated, and becoming obsessive about looking after one's own interests in the face of demands to do otherwise. Christina Moore's elegant diction stirs in a measure of attention-getting gravitas to this weighty mixture of classic relationship advice. T.W. © AudioFile 2006, Portland, Maine-- Copyright © AudioFile, Portland, Maine
Most helpful customer reviews
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
A life changer
By Amy Brooks
I know this is an incredibly cheesy thing to say, but this book changed my life. It is a simplistic yet thorough look at this disorder. Its roots, its patterns, and, most importantly, its solutions. Like many who have probably read this book, I found myself being told I was co-dependent in therapy and not understanding what exactly that meant. Beattie even touches on that vagueness in this book, admits that codependency is not well-defined. Reading this defined it for me. It clarified exactly what it was and made me understand where it came from and how to solve it. This book was where my recovery began.
I will say this: this book is somewhat about God. If you are like me, you don't care where solutions come from as long as they work. I am a Christian so for me the tone and frequent mentions of God were not really of note, but if you are sensitive to such things just know it is a part of this book although I wouldn't say it is overbearing. You can easily enjoy this and take away plenty of help without being a religious or spiritual person.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
Wow.
By Erik S
I've struggled with this unknowingly for as long as I can remember. In the midst of going through the hardest thing I've ever faced; the willing letting go of the person I love more then any other human being, this has been an eye opener. Overcoming the death of a parent was tough. Overcoming addiction was seemingly impossible. They but prepared me for the insanity I just survived. I found solace and strength in my actions and this book was a pillar and beacon of hope. It is beautifully written from experience in an easy to understand language; the kind you can still read as your eyes are blurred by tears as they strike home.
Thank you. This book has helped me immensely in the arduous first steps of continued recovery, acceptance, and forgiveness of self.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
If you need it, it will help you
By deelee82
After growing up with an alcoholic and (what I thought was) a narcissist, I have been carrying a ton of weight on my back. I started reading this book on Friday night after writing the Samaritans for help with suicidal thoughts. I feel like the last day and a half has brought me more peace and contentment than the years of depression/anxiety medications ever did (just my personal experience - not everyone will feel this way.) It's still "fresh" and I still need to try taking this new approach to work next week, but I FINALLY understand why I've been how I've been and that it doesn't have to be that way. Even if you're not in a relationship with an addict, this book can help you. If you're anxious, depressed, feel stuck, feel like nobody likes you, whatever - there is something to be gained from this book.
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